July 25, 2021

Minnesota Twins announce new all-Kasota gold uniform [SATIRE] (Twinkie Town)


With Nike taking over the uniform responsibilities for Major League Baseball, a number of teams have announced new uniforms, whether it be an alternate or an addition to the standard uniform rotation. Minnesota Twins fans got to experience one those announcements this past week as the team revealed that the powder blues from the ‘70s and ‘80s are back as an alternate both at Target Field and on the road. In addition, the Twins announced today that they have added a new uniform set to the main rotation: all-Kasota gold uniforms that will replace the home whites that everyone hates so much.

“We got some great feedback from our fans,” said Dave St Peter, president of the Minnesota Twins, “and we heard that they really missed the pinstripe uniforms that we ditched a few years ago.” St Peter grabbed at a sheet that was covering a mannequin on stage to reveal the new uniform.


“Don’t they look snazzy?” asked St Peter. “We also heard that everyone loves the Kasota gold color that we incorporated starting in 2015, so we though that would be a great, solid color to have with the pinstripe theme.” St Peter went on to say that…

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